The Dick Pic
Jess: I went to dinner with my friend David last night.
Me: Oh yeah?
Jess: Yeah, I saw his dick.
Me: Oh.. like for dinner?
I’m moving to Paddington tomorrow and I can not wait. No more bad habits. No more bullshit. I’m on the right side of the city and the world will be my oyster. That’s it. Shit will be awesome and I’m not going to be bummed about anything ever again.
When someone I know in real life starts following...
ahlistenalison: true friendship is bullying your friends into watching the tv shows you watch
Rules my Grandma's Psychiatrist gave her in 56'
Get some cheap dishes and break them when you get upset. Learn how to say “NO” and don’t feel guilty about it Buy something frivolous for yourself once in awhile, like a new hat. Never again do anything you don’t want to do.
roseisreturning: mermaids don’t have thigh gaps but they can still lure men to their deaths
I like the sea: we understand one another. It is always yearning, sighing for...– Greta Garbo (via glittertomb)
wescalou: I’m reading your palm and it says it belongs on my butt
brvdleysoileau: how is “slut” even an insult wtf get that dick grl
WHEN I MOVE AT THE ESPY.
conflictgenesis said: I won’t lie, your lips are what I noticed first. I just saw this! Stupid no webs! Not the bear?? haha
Oh sweet Tumblr.
I have zero internet at my house right now as I’m moving. So I have come to my parents house to download the universe! Hook it to my veins!
I literally stayed in bed all day
Lately posts I’ve made as far back as 2010 are getting reblogged all over the place. How weird. What are you doing all the way back there?
Holy shit I miss Melbourne
I miss my friends. I miss my old place and my housemate. I miss pints. I miss coats. I miss the Rochester and Ding Dong. I miss Greens on Sydney road. I miss Gami chicken. Ugh. I should go out on nights like tonight.